Hi welcome back.
This brings us to section three of the course and this section.
I'm hoping we're going to do a relatively good job of just simply building upon everything that I've
shared with you throughout by the last section which ended up being quite comprehensive didn't it.
Now if you have made it this far and if you are enjoying the teachings there's a pretty good chance
that you are becoming better or slightly better acquainted with yourself which is kind of the goal and
the main purpose of this course.
It's an absolutely imperative isn't it that if we want to coach other people in life we've got to become
established in life.
We could understand ourselves how it is that we Intel allies our external events circumstances situations
relationships are wins or losses because how we interpret everything that goes on and our outside world
pretty much determines how it is that we feel about ourselves and within ourselves and our inside world
and how we feel about ourselves.
Well this is what presents people with problems isn't it.
So that last section was devoted to look at thought life and also exploring our emotions how the two
are intrinsically linked in order to open up this section of the course just by separating and really
just showing and these five areas of internal experience that we have.
We've got our opinions which are kind of like glorified thoughts their ideas.
There's an ancient Greek philosopher Plato who have mentioned once or twice up until now he had a fantastic
opinion about opinions.
He said that opinions are nothing more than a medium between truth and complete ignorance.
But it's a fear listened to people throughout society.
How many people have you heard say that we are entitled to having an opinion.
Everyone's entitled to an opinion.
Fantastic as long as our opinions and our thoughts are largely based upon truth and not ignorance switches.
Obviously something we're going to have to work out for ourselves isn't something this course is going
to hopefully help us to become better established then the facts are not always thoughts.
By now I'm hoping you are able to identify that was kind of like we have these two little voices whispering
anywhere we are pretty much all of the time we've got a little devil.
We've got the little angel we've got part of us that wants to do great things we've got part of us that
wants to sometimes do nothing or do destructive things and it's not because we're but at the core it's
just because we're all given free will right we can all go any direction that we want to in life whenever
we choose to.
Our emotions tend to be our results of the caliber and the quality of our thinking and even our beliefs
our beliefs can actually be quite inaccurate and quite unhelpful at times.
And this is pretty much what we're looking at this week because this is where people get stuck.
All right.
It's kind of like how beliefs operate on this unconscious level and within a kind of deep down here
it's kind of like the more times we think about something or the more times we experience something
we kind of get our thoughts validated or the thoughts end up becoming the beliefs we boat and base our
life upon.
I shared an example in the last section of the course about the times that I'd failed in life you know
if we have and if we fail once well this could be a random event if we fail twice or this could be a
coincidence but if we fail three times or four times or five times in a certain area well this could
be a pattern which might therefore mean something about us and if we are not grounded and secure within
ourselves or if your clients are not grounded and secure within themselves a pretty good chance or go
on to tell themselves some stories and end up believing some some pretty unhelpful things about themselves.
So it is absolutely crucial throughout life that we become established and grounded in truth all of
the time because when we are not grounded and established in truth we are just both in our lifes and
basing our decisions upon the whims of our emotions and or our own naivete and ignorance i.e. our assumptions
and our opinions.
So unlike Toluca beliefs kind of like this.
All right.
This is a keeper here in Scotland.
I live in a place called Dunfermline which is around about fifty miles away from a small town called
Arbroath.
Now Arbroath is right on the coast and it's famous for Arbroath Smokies Arbroath Smokies are just smoked
kippers kind of like a Scottish delicacy.
No I don't know how these things ever became a delicacy because they absolutely stink.
They really do.
And this is the why I want to use this big Kip out here to represent our beliefs in life.
All right I want you to get this mental anchor going on inside your mind.
Sometimes we end up propping up and doing our best to justify our beliefs don't we.
Sometimes our beliefs are just big stinking kippers.
All right.
Think about it.
Some people go through life and say I'm no good at anything.
I'm useless I'm not smart enough.
Then we have some people who say to say to themselves or other people you know I'm entitled to this
I'm entitled to that.
And then we have expectations of other people when it's kind of like the world should do us a service
and should be committed to sorting our life.
So then what I'm saying is some people have some pretty unhelpful beliefs and this keeper is on a table
all right.
And this table represents the validated thoughts that become our beliefs.
All right.
Just to help here hopefully really really grasp what I'm talking about here.
I remember when I was sharing that timeline in the land the last section of the course I gave reference
to the experience that I've had with my dad when he was laying in bed.
He just turned his back on me and then he told me to get out.
And then there was a sun droning thing and she can call told me to go away.
She told me that I that I stunk like of the smelly boy.
And then it didn't get picked off the football team and then I didn't pass my initial air Amari entrance
tests.
Well when we're first born we're we're a clean slate.
We don't have any beliefs we don't have any world views.
We don't have any ignorance based opinions wouldn't have any thoughts or preferences or orientations.
All right.
We're just wide open to learning and experience in life.
All right.
So see this.
So see this table here as as an idea.
All right.
Or as an experience.
All right.
So say for example and we were to be born and then reach the age of five or six or seven years old and
someone was to leave our lives.
Right now we're not gonna know what this means but it gives us an experience.
All right.
It gives us one experience here and then at the age of six someone else was to leave our lifes.
And this gives us another experience which is pretty much exactly the same.
No.
What we're looking to do is we're looking to connect ideas especially if events in our lifes result
want us feel in a certain way that we like or we don't like because we're meaning making machines we're
looking to interpret our life's events all the time and come up with some sort of conclusion so we can
justify the things and the events and experiences that we have in life.
So let's just say that we reached the age of ten years old and then we won't really want to get pegged
for the local football team but we don't they don't want us because they say that we're not good enough.
We're starting to identify this trend.
All right.
Well this person rejected me I wasn't good enough for them.
This person rejected me it wasn't good enough for them.
This person rejected me it wasn't good enough for them and then we go through life and we apply for
a job and then we don't get it because someone else is more qualified than us more skilled than us better
looking than us.
And then we see the mom and the woman of our dreams and we ask the moment that dream date and then they
say no because they've found someone else who's more attractive than us and we end up going through
life just having all of these experiences and what we end up doing as we end up linking them all.
All right.
And we say things like I'm not smart enough I'm not lovable enough I'm not skilled enough I'm not talented
enough I'm not good looking enough.
And then favorite if anyone was to say well behavior I that that conclusion.
They will say because I had this experience back here.
All right.
And then I had this experience back here and I had this experience back here and had this experience
back here and that's the reasons why I'm not enough in this area of my life that's why there is a deficit
within me this is why I have this big fat dirty stinking Kipper that's holding me back and prevent me
from doing all the things that I really want to be doing in life.
All right.
A little bit dramatic might seem like I'm going over the top but I guarantee that we all have them and
the things about beliefs is that they operate on an unconscious level.
So if I was to ask you right now what do you believe.
Well if you are we inclined you could start talking about conspiracy theories you could start talking
about the aliens coming down.
You could start talking about Jesus.
You can start talking about God whoever your god is.
If there is a God if there isn't a god.
And generally when people are given reference to what their beliefs are all they're really talking about
is their opinions their thoughts what they think what they think might be true what we think might be
true isn't always necessarily our beliefs our beliefs operate on an unconscious level.
Our thoughts and opinions and world views they're not there pretty much all appear in the subconscious
and in the conscious part of our mind so when we ask people what do you believe about yourself.
All right.
And then they go on to tell us well if people knew what they actually believed about themselves and
where that's connected and understood their beliefs and their level no one would ever need any coaches
or any guidance or any help her mentoring or coaching in life everyone would be fine as sort in their
own stuff out for themselves.
But the fact of the matter is that our belief our beliefs are and become not changed that noose around
their necks kind of like the chain around the head of the elephant story in the in the last section
of the course.
So if we understand this all right it's not about us just trying to you know rectify and offer people
new beliefs.
And here's the thing.
All the positive thinking in the world aren't going to change these big fat kippers.
All right I've been in the personal development industry for long enough to know some of the approaches
that people take towards shifting their beliefs.
Some people like to stand in front of mirrors and chant mantras and all this kind of stuff and you can
do as much a mirror chant and what you want to but aren't even going to rectify any limits and beliefs
that we have.
All right.
We sometimes need to backtrack through the process and establish where the beliefs first come from.
All right.
The first thought we have and goes on to then connect with a second thought about the next similar experience
that we have and then because we're going to make machines we're looking to connect all four life's
experiences to ultimately make sense of our outer world.
So and this is a caught a few ideas I've taken from the late great Gandhi all right.
It says our beliefs become our thoughts well our beliefs only become our thoughts once our thoughts
have become our beliefs because it's our beliefs that actually validate our thoughts for us from our
perspective anyway our thoughts and become our words are the things that we say the things that we talk
about the most are pretty much just the things that occupy our mind the most.
If you want to know what a person's thinking about just listen to the words that they're saying all
right.
Ask them questions about themselves.
They'll open their mouth and tell you all about what's going on inside of their mind and we know that's
what a person is talking about is pretty much always going to be a reflection of life which they believe
about themselves whether they're aware of this or whether they are not.
Our words become our habits our habits become our values our values become our destiny whatever that
means.
So am I like this quote because it kind of does paint a nice picture on how all of these different aspects
and parts of our human experience marriage into one.
There's no single part of us stands alone in isolation.
We can go through life thinking that it's okay to believe whatever we want to believe in thinking that
it's okay to say whatever it is that we want to say and we can we can be pro freedom of speech as much
as we want to.
And the funny thing about freedom of speech is freedom of speech is generally okay as long as we agree
with everything that other people are saying to us isn't it.
Freedom of speech can sometimes be a little bit a funny thing as well.
But what people generally talk about the most is just simply a reflection of that which is going on
inside of their head and that which is going on inside of their head is often more often than not a
reflection of light which is going on inside of their heart.
So sharing this with you.
All right.
And just because it's important to understand us as life coaches or when our clients come to us.
All right.
They most likely are not going to be quite as aware of the human experience as what we are going to
be.
So when they come through our doors and start giving voice to their issues their challenges their problems
their goals they're going to have all sorts of ideas about what they think their issues and challenges
and hurdles and problems may be but they aren't always going to know because as I'm hoping you're aware
by you know the greatest issue that we have the greatest news and that pretty much no holds us back
in life isn't so much our ability or our perceived limitations but is in fact just the beliefs that
we have about what our abilities and what our limitations are.
So this is pretty much what I want to explore with you through the rest of this section.